Saturday, July 13, 2024

It’s Official: Mrs. Lanzone is Coming Back!

East’s beloved English teacher Mrs. Lanzone is returning to East for the 2024-2025 school year, following a year of teaching 7th graders at Heim Middle School. She will be teaching AP English Language, English 10A, and English 11A, much to the delight of suffering AP Lang students across the grades!

#speednap: The Race to Snooze Causing Scores of Snores

TikTok trends are no stranger to the school environment. A new trend has swept through the East hallways: "#speednapping.”

Putting the COKE in Coca-Cola: The Reintroduction of Cocaine Back Into the Popular Soft...

Over the last few years, Coca-Cola has introduced a variety  of new Coke flavors, including Cherry Coke, Vanilla Coke,  Zesty Blood Orange, and Coke with Coffee. None have had the desired effect of dramatically increasing sales for Coca-Cola, the manufacturer of the Coke Beverage.

Genshin Impact Announces Removal of Pity System (April Fools Edition)

Since its debut in September, Genshin Impact has amassed a dedicated playerbase of almost forty million active players. Part of what brings in these players are the 5 star characters. Headed by an intriguing story of mystery and betrayal, especially in the second act of the Liyue chapter, starring 5 star characters as Zhongli, Xiao, and Ganyu. Solely on mobile, these three Liyue featured characters brought in over $45.4 million in revenue for miHoYo.

East, You Lost Your JDD and Prom Rights

In a heartbreaking and unexpected announcement, East’s administration has recently announced that both the beloved Junior Dinner Dance (JDD) and Senior Prom have been canceled for this school year. This news comes in the wake of an increase in use of a vape-able caffeine called Celsi-vape and the cost of repairing the plumbing connected to three of the boys' bathrooms. Both reasons are unrelated but contributed to the decision.

APRIL FOOLS – Ads to be placed on WITS

The Superintendent of the Williamsville Central School District has announced that advertisements will be placed on the Williamsville Information Tracking System, a platform...

Williamsville East High School to Cut Many AP Classes

Unfortunately, Williamsville East High School is no longer able to offer many of their AP classes. This is a tragic event, for Williamsville East has always been known for their academic excellence and wide range of AP offerings.This will have a great toll on student life here at East and will have a massive impact on student’s lives following graduation from East.

Lorde Announces Lead Single off of Much-Awaited New Album (April Fools Edition)

After much wait (nearly four years), Lorde is releasing the first single from her new album. With her last studio album, Melodrama, being released in 2017, many fans have been clamoring for content since. Due to many artists opting to announce and release albums online during the pandemic, fans have been hoping Lorde will follow suit.

APRIL FOOLS – Joe Biden announces ice cream pop-up shops

by Joelle Silvestri and Maler Suresh Biden vs. Sanders, the battle of the year. With the next elections coming, YOU may be wondering who...

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