Thanksgiving: a time for gratitude, appreciation, not mentioning politics when your family comes over, and pretending your aunt’s cooking doesn’t make you want to vomit. That doesn’t sound like a very fun holiday. However, it is a necessary evil in order to prepare us for the intense holiday season in December. I even go as far as to call the holiday Pre-Christmas instead of Thanksgiving. Many disagree with me, and you may be angry with me already, but please hear me out.
First of all, it is important to keep in mind what I mean by Pre-Christmas. I am not calling Thanksgiving a miniature version of Christmas, or a direct copy of Christmas. Pre stands for preparation in this case. Thanksgiving is Pre-Christmas, AKA Preparation for Christmas. The main reason for many people’s immediate disagreement is their misunderstanding of what I mean.
Now that this misconception is cleared up, how is Thanksgiving preparing us for Christmas? As enjoyable and fun as the holiday season can be, it can also be stressful. Thanksgiving prepares us for dealing with gross family. For example, remember your aunt’s terrible cooking I mentioned in the beginning? Well, you’re going to have to pretend it tastes amazing to avoid hurting her feelings. You may have to do the same when the holiday season comes around if your aunt happens to get you the absolute last thing you would ever want as a gift. She could have put a lot of thought into the gift, so you better use those skills you’ve learned from Thanksgiving dinner and pretend this sweater you will absolutely never wear is the best thing you have ever received.
Staying on the topic of family, Thanksgiving prepares us for being around lots of people for prolonged periods of time. This may be something my fellow introverts can relate to, but being surrounded by people and potential socialization for so long can be terrifying. Thanksgiving can lead to spending hours with immediate family, along with relatives you rarely see. Christmas and the holiday season in general may continue this time spent with people, even if it isn’t family. The holidays may be celebrated at large events at various places. Every single place in existence is filled to the brim with people in later December. Spending several hours with family can prepare us for pushing along filled stores and event venues.
You may be saying now, “wait! According to this logic, autumn should just be called pre-winter, and high school should just be called pre-college”. Well, here is where Pre-Christmas differentiates itself from that argument. People care about autumn, and people care about high school. Less and less people seem to care about Thanksgiving each year, but so many people care about Christmas and the other many holidays in December. Thanksgiving nowadays seems to cause controversy, with misinformation being spread about the holiday’s origins (similar to Columbus Day). For many Americans, spending time with distant family feels more like a chore than a celebration. No one seems to care about Thanksgiving anymore. Pre-Christmas on the other hand, that makes the holiday seem more useful than an insignificant chore.
There are other smaller arguments. Many businesses and households start to decorate for the holiday season during November, and Christmas songs are already playing in every store as soon as November 1st comes. Those who find these annoying can spend November, or Pre-Christmas, adjusting to these changes before the larger abundance comes after Thanksgiving.
Seriously, no one cares about Thanksgiving. Doesn’t Pre-Christmas sound so much more exciting? We would probably get so many more songs and movies, such as the hit classic song All I Want For Pre-Christmas Is For My Grandparents To Stop Fighting About Donald Trump’s Presidency by Mariah Carey. Don’t forget Theodore the Teal Tailed Turkey, the story of a misfit turkey with a teal tail, who later uses his abnormality to rescue the other turkeys from being consumed. That sounds outstanding, and we will only get the full story if we convert ourselves to Pre-Christmas.
In conclusion, I made lots of amazing points, and my mom agrees with me, and my mom is never wrong.
